RAD GEAR: Ogio All Elements Stealth Bag
I have this bag that I call my Fun Bag. It’s a green rubberized duffel bag that I keep an assortment of fun-related things in, just in case something happens and I need to be fun. I’ve got a Slyde handplane, a bunch of wax, a waxcomb, finkeys, extra fins, sunscreen, a harmonica that I can’t play, warm beers, an old lime, a squished straw hat, a frisbee (which is, in my opinion, the human race’s most fun invention), and about six pounds of sand. It’s also waterproof, which is cool because I fall over a lot, and I’m often near the water.
But I might throw it away. Ogio makes this bag that’s pretty much the souped up version of my Fun Bag. It’s waterproof. It has a whole bunch of different pockets. My old Fun Bag is just one big pocket, so my wax is always mixing with my six pounds of sand then scraping my nipples off. It also has no insulation at all, so the beer gets warm really fast. And Ogio’s bag, called the Stealth, has some kind of padding that I suspect might double as beer insulation. But maybe not. Don’t quote me on it. I can’t find it in the specs, anyway.
But here are the specs that I can find, should you want a fun bag of your own:
1. Completely waterproof – If Dexter didn’t use garbage bags to get rid of his bodies, he could use this.
2. 360-degree reflective screen print – It might be called the Stealth, but if you’re wandering the highway in the dead of night with it on, you will light up like a Christmas tree.
3. Quick access front zippered stash pocket – When you’ve got your beers at the bottom of your bag, it sucks to pull everything out that you’ve stuff on top. Just pull them out of the bottom!
4. Removable high visibility liner – Two bags! In one bag! Consolidate!
5. Laptop sleeve – Laptops are expensive. It’s not good for them to smash them around in the trunk of your car with your tire iron and golf clubs.
6. Tablet sleeve – Although I will never understand why people with laptops and cell phones also have tablets, there is room for one in here.
