Jamie O’Brien and the ASP couldn’t be on more different wavelengths. But that’s why they’re a perfect match.
Pasty and Irish with an affinity for dubstep and energy drinks – James Duncan O’Brien is about as much of a stereotypical “surfer” on paper as Miley Cyrus is a choir girl. But in the water, in big barrels and high progression waves alike, he’s on par with the world’s best. And that combination of eccentricity and surf craft futurism is exactly why he needs to get his pale ass on the World Tour asap.
Admit it, the WSL lineup is stale and boring. Everyone is too afraid to step on each others’ toes. The closest thing we had to a surf world “beef” this past season was when Gabriel Medina was almost allowed to call out Glenn Hall for gettin’ up in his biz. Nobody wants to be earnest. Nobody feels like they can speak their mind. And with the WSL revving up their campaign, attempting to reach audiences beyond the core surf demographic, someone like Jamie is exactly who they need. He’d tell it like it is. He’d throw the surf industry’s collective over-congeniality to the wind. He’d make surfing fun to watch for the masses. Remember when he burned the ASP rulebook? It’s that type of reckless abandon, à la Dennis Rodman or John McEnroe, that’ll maximize viewership.
And if you’re worried about Jamie struggling in high performance waves like Snapper and Trestles, you better bite your narrow-minded tongue. Naysayers be damned. Before he began trucking down the tube town highway, Jamie had some of the best aerial antics in the game. He’s got the air reverses (saturated as they may be nowadays). He’s got the power carves. He’s got the goods that can stand up to the rest of ’em.
Plus, the dude’s a goddamn showman. He’s like a rodeo clown (not the surfing maneuver, though he has those on lock, too) – every time he hits the water, he does not disappoint. Take, for example, his early round heat during the Pipe trials. From coming out of a tube Quasimodo stance to the raddest final wave dismount you’ve ever seen, he surfed the most exciting heat of the contest, trials and main event included, thus far. Perhaps if he goes on to win the contest, it’ll drive him to compete in other areas of the world, aside from his own backyard.
But let’s face it, JOB has a pretty sweet deal going for him. It’s no wonder he’s not busting his ass for some meaningless piece of sterling silver that he doesn’t need or want. With WhoIsJOB at whatever incarnation it’s at now (17.0?), he’s got it made. Somewhere between Jackass and surf porn, the WhoIsJOB video series allows him to basically remain a hyperactive, ADHD 12-year-old while also surfing perfect waves. Not to mention Jamie gets to boss around Poopies, his dog-like disciple, forcing him to do all the dangerous stunts he doesn’t want to. Not a bad “job.”
The odds of Jamie O’Brien joining the World Tour are slimmer than his girlfriend’s bikini line. But if the WSL and the competitive surfing machine wants to survive and thrive, they need a new crop of unfiltered entertainers like Jamie. Or they need to allow for some conflict, some drama – and not in the form of Wilko being combo’d by Fanning in the Quarters at Teahupo’o. They need it in the water and out. One of the main arguments against the WSL is that it’s too proper, too corporate and structured for surfing, like a vanilla tennis tour. Guys like Jamie O’Brien could take that vanilla and whip up a milkshake.
