Happy birthday, princess. Hope 43 is magical. Photo: Shane Dorian | Instagram
Happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to you,
happy birthday dear Kelly…
happy birthday to you!
Today, surfing’s greatest champion turns 43! Considering Kelly won his first world title at 20-years-old, excluding his three year “retirement,” the champ has been in the business of winning world titles for half of his life. While many would tire of the ups and downs of competing, Kelly comes back each year pumped up on yoga and chia seeds ready to kick a bunch of 21-year-old ass. But in all seriousness, Kelly, while your hair may be starting to thin, we think you’re still the raddest 43 year old around. We here at The Inertia wish you the happiest of days, and in honor of this special one, we’ve collected our favorite Kelly Slater gold through the years.
Kelly Slater (L) not only starred in full embodiement of everything that is goo in America, Baywatch, but also dated its leading lady, an American of the best, er, proportions. Photo: Dave Morgan | Globe Photos
1. The Fact That He Starred on Baywatch
Sure, other people might give Kelly grief for this, but in reality, they’re just jealous. While the show itself might be a little cheesy, Pam Anderson was a goddess. Who wouldn’t want to run down the beach with her? Plus Kelly made surfing relevant within the beach bunny Malibu scene. He was probably the only person on that show who actually knew how to swim, and that added a layer of authenticity to the show’s dynamic. Plus, he’s probably still making some pretty nice royalties off those nine episodes.
Kelly Slater: the man in the white suit. Photo: Quiksilver
2. The White Wetsuit
As if his surfing didn’t stand out enough in the water, around 2010, Kelly forever changed the fashion world. Slater started rocking a white wetsuit, and the world bowed down. Not only did Kelly’s talent (and titles) appoint him the king of riding the surfboard, but he had the neoprene marker of the gods to cement his place in history. To be honest, no one else on the planet could wear a white suit and get away with it, but when you’re Kelly freaking Slater, you do what you want.
Hair or nah?
3. When Kelly Had Hair
We all know and love the distinguished shaved head Slater of modern day. His lack of hair suits him, but it’s nice to reflect upon Kelly’s less bald days. Back in the day, Kelly could sweep his luscious locks out of his dreamy eyes, and girls would fall at his feet. Slater had really nice hair. However, his hair handicapped his ability to conquer the world, so it simply had to be cut.
4. Kelly Slater Pro Surfer
Let us not forget the staple video game of all nineties beach rats. Back in the day, kids used to fight over who got to use the Gameboy because of this thing. The daily dilemma was whether to be Kelly, Lisa Andersen, Tom Carroll, Tom Curren, Nathan Fletcher, Bruce Irons, Rob Machado, or Kalani Robb. While no one can ever know what it’s like to surf like Kelly Slater, this game is probably the closest you can get. The game lets you do things that pretty much defy physics, much like what Kelly does on a daily basis.
Photo: WSL/Tostee
5. The Teahupoo Beer
This might be our favorite moment in surfing history. During an iconic final at Teahupoo in 2005, Kelly surfed a perfect 20/20 heat. While this alone is wonderful, the cherry on top was that after scoring two perfect tens, Kelly caught another wave and drank a beer in the barrel. Does life really get any better than that? We think not.
Cheers, Kelly. Here is to a happy year ahead!
