If Batman wore a watch, this would be it.
I’m not usually a watch guy. I don’t wake up to an alarm, and I don’t have much of a schedule, save for the one dictated by tides and sunlight. I’m an old man in a lot of respects–asleep by ten at the latest and up around five. Night is for sleeping, and day is for doing.
But tide watches are pretty damn handy. Remember the Casio Baby-G? Those monstrosities of neon and rubber? I hated those watches, and I had it stuck in my head that G-Shock watches were all horrible. That’s why I was surprised when Casio came out with a watch called the Frogman that actually looks good, instead of looking like some large tropical bird took a dump on a wrist. If you’re someone who likes watches that have features, this is the watch you need. If Batman had a watch, this would be it. I’m pretty sure there’s a grappling hook hidden somewhere inside it–I just haven’t found the button to release it (pretty sure it’s page 10,140 in the manual).
Normally I hate to use the term “waterman.” It’s on par with “soul surfer”–as soon as someone calls themselves either, I immediately think they’re a fraud. They can be the most legit waterman or soul surfer in the world, but if they come right out and call themselves one… well, I don’t buy it. Mark Healey could call himself a waterman (because he is most certainly that), and I’d scoff in my head. Dave Rastovich could call himself a soul surfer (because he is most certainly that), and I’d sneer behind a smile. It’s stupid, I know.
But the Frogman is a waterman’s watch. Just don’t let me catch anyone saying “I need the Frogman, because I’m a real waterman.” Casio took everything you can possibly think that you’d need for anything ocean related and jammed it into a watch. And it’s a huge watch. Dinner plate big. It is entirely possible that one could fit a full 16 oz. steak on it, with room for mashed potatoes.
Along with the usual gadgets (four alarms, stopwatch, calendar, grappling hook, etc), the Frogman self charges on solar power, has 31 time zones, a moon age graph, a tide graph, and a dive time and surface interval measurement, along with a bunch of other stuff that you will only need if you’re doing truly awesome shit, which I am usually not. But wearing it might make people think that I need it, and impress the shit out of anyone that looks at my wrist. “Holy crap,” they’ll think. “That guy must be a Navy Seal or Batman.” And I will not correct them, because Batman and Navy Seals are awesome.
